Late night realizations

One turns off their phone not because they don't want to receive calls but because they want to avoid the pain of disappointment when they receive none.

To be called mine

               Crave

I crave your every touch

I crave your very presence

And it seems time has no power

To quench that yearning

It’s crazy that I could be so in love with a person that feels like the exact opposite of who I am. I know opposites attract but somehow I feel that almost in every aspect of our life, we are at the opposite sides of the spectrum. I didn’t even want you in the first place but it surprised me that my gutsy attitude and no care air I give off towards you would spark a curiosity that would turn into admiration. I always put people off by being aloof but it amazes you how I can be fine on my own, that I don’t need other people to make me happy.

You like talking with people, getting to know them and analyzing their personality (haha wag kang praning). I, on the other hand, am picky with people. I try to “feel” my way towards them then make friends. I’m a wallflower and you’re the center of attention. How could you notice me? Eventually, your weirdness and your persistence towards getting answers about me made me look at you on a personal level. There I got to know a bit of who you are and everything went downhill from there… KIDDING! Before I knew it you are pulling me towards you and there was no way I can take a step back from falling in love with you. We are only on our second month but we feel comfortable with each other. I haven’t known you for a year but things just fell into place.

One day with you is not enough to quench the need to feel connected with you. Crazy, right? I, who is every bit self-absorbed, would want my whole day to be with another person. I’m not fond of feeling that someone “owns” me. I prefer to stay autonomous but with you… I don’t mind being called mine. I must be losing my mind.

We don’t have to do anything, just being together is fine. Even if we are doing different things, as long as I can feel your presence with me, it’s already enough to make my heart sing. It also scares me at the same time because I don’t know how long my happy bubble will last until a pin will pop it. Despite our strong feelings towards each other, it hasn’t been an easy road and I know more obstacles are gonna come our way. But as long as we love each other and we are willing to work things out no matter what and that breakup is never an option, then I pray to God that we can really make it through.

Abused Generosity

Mother told me this story about an old woman who keeps on visiting our little sari-sari store way before I was born. She would give food to the old woman and ask her about who she is and how she’s doing and where are her relatives. The old woman replied that she’s separated from her family and wants to go home to the province and be reunited with them. My mother, being compassionate, fed her and gave her money so she can return home. Surprisingly the woman kept coming back so my mother wondered why she didn’t return home yet after giving her money. My mom then found out that it was just a modus operandi. The old woman actually lives nearby and tells stories about returning home so she can ask for money and be given free food. My mother was terribly hurt over being deceived. After that my mother became cautious of people who are asking money to go home to his or her family. Mother just wishes that whatever assistance she gave that old woman; she put it to good use.

This is another old writeup I composed. I forget when exactly but I think I was still in college or about to graduate or a fresh grad.

Rose

You are like a rose

Pretty but with thorns

Holding you is a mixture

Of happiness & scorn

You are both beauty & madness

You drive me mad with misery

And gladness

You paint me red

And give me a feeling of dread

But leave me breathless

With your soft caress

 

 

 

Photo not mine. Credits go to the owner so check out this link. :)

Burst

Sometimes I just feel like bursting
Into a million stars at the thought
Of you loving me