It’s kind of difficult that we have
different views on time. You pursue your goals to the point that you sometimes
forget to live in the present. To “stop and smell the flowers” as they say. No
matter how much I try to explain that concept, you don’t get it. You’re whole
being rebels at the thought of pausing. Perhaps it’s because you haven’t seen
what time sweeps away when you least notice its passing. Perhaps it’s because
you’re the eldest kid and you lead the way that you don’t see the pitfalls of
rushing towards that goal too fast, sacrificing precious moments that will
never return.
I, on the other hand, have seen
countless moments go to waste because proper attention wasn’t given to them.
When the person wished to go back to that time, relive it... it’s gone forever.
It’s not gonna happen the way one envisions it; slipped from one’s fingers
completely. A sad mimicry to that moment to make up for lost time is mostly the
remedy but the essence of that moment is lost forever.
I want to avoid such occurrence so I do
my best to grab that moment, hold on to it, chase it, crystallize it so I can
always go back to it when I need to. I have this great need to document all the
important phases of my life because I don’t want to miss anything. I don’t want
history to repeat itself. I don’t want to make the same mistake of taking
things for granted, of always thinking I have more time with this person
because one can never know the changes that might come. Better be safe than
sorry. You may be irritated at how zealous I am at being IN THE MOMENT but I
don’t care. You can get mad all you like but I’m not taking chances. Never
again.
I hope one day you will be able to
fully grasp my perspective and learn to slow down and smell the flowers. That
you will come to appreciate the moment without suddenly jumping because you
remember the rat race towards your goal.
I’m not asking you to stop chasing
those goals, just slow down enough that you balance that fiery passion with
cool leisure.
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