Falling in love is both a beautiful and mysterious thing. It makes you feel different kinds of emotions all because of one person… but that is also the reason why it’s scary. You get to learn different things about yourself, both good and bad. You realize you can actually sacrifice something for another person or you can be so selfish that you scare yourself. How can another existence be of so much importance to your mood? Your decisions? Falling in love can make even the most logical person make illogical decisions. You miss the person despite the fact that you just said goodbye. I mean, how crazy can that be? You get used to having this person around that a sudden change in routine will make you flip 180 degrees… or maybe that’s just me. Hahahaha.
Anyway, here’s an example of how it affects your mood: You walk and then you casually greet the person like any other friend and you get ignored. You act that it doesn’t bother you but inside you did a 180 degree flip from happy-sappy to grumpy. Just like that, the person affects you. And the usual “love songs suddenly make sense” or “this song really speaks to me about my love life right now!” and all that s%$#@. Hahaha.
I’m the kind of person who wants to keep my real feelings in check but somehow this one person upset the apple cart and I’m left running after the scattered apples and trying my best to retrieve them all and arrange them neatly on my cart. To be honest, until now I’m still looking for the other pieces and trying to get my equilibrium back. It was crazy because I met him during a strange time in my life. Before I knew it, he crept into my life and was stubborn enough to stay… for now and hopefully for good? Naaaah. I’m still trying to figure out about how exactly I feel for him. His qualities are the ones that I don’t exactly look for in a person but he has endearing qualities that would fluster a tsundere like me. I won’t know what to say or how to respond properly for fear that it might not be true so I end up retorting mean words at him.
I don’t know what will happen, everything feels like a dream sometimes… However.. I hope that it will all make sense and every imbalance feeling, crazy decisions & YOLO moments will all be worth it.
